A return-to-office order dressed as a values memo. The word “required” never appears, yet it does the most work by being absent. The commute the salary forgot is yours to price.
Unhinged, the same beats with the satire off its leash, is part of the full plan.
This is a story, not advice. The company is made up, and so is the memo. The decisions are not, and the real versions, what a commute actually costs you, how to frame the conversation, what your number should be, are in the guides and tools when you want them.